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Motherhood and My Mental Health Awakening

Updated: May 8

Kaitlynn happily spending time with houseplants
Photo by Alyssa Barletter Photography

Before we jump in, I want to celebrate: I'm now a Blogger!

It wasn't until not just thinking about starting a blog, but receiving coaching for it, that I remembered how much I've always wanted to write.


As a kid, that was probably the second career choice I'd made (right after teacher, and before fashion designer). I recall writing short stories, being in love with words and narrating my life in my diaries. Every year of high school I was in Yearbook, three of which I was Editor. Somehow it fell away though--probably all the other things that society put in front of me and expected me to pick up and run with. And here I am now, after lots and lots of self-work, ready to step into it and share with all of you.


 

Motherhood and My Mental Health Awakening...


Of course I want you to get to know me and with May being Mental Health Awareness Month and Mothers' Day coming up, it feels in alignment to have Motherhood and My Mental Health Awakening as this month's blog theme to share about a vital time in my life. Four years ago I had the biggest initial awakening of my life (so far). It's one of the main, if not the biggest, reasons I've stepped into coaching and sharing my gifts, so writing about this awakening is really important to me.


Kaitlynn holding Aurora
I spent a whole lot of time on that basement couch in 2020. Aurora was a few days shy of one month old here.


A tidbit of Aurora's birth story. She was born on November 26, 2019 via emergency c-section. We were incredibly well taken care of and Jon, my husband, was able to stay home with us for I believe a week. Family (all of which lived about 5 hours away) stayed one night.


Emergency c-sections are, well, not really planned and the surgeon moved very quickly which I'm forever grateful for. Once we were home, it was difficult to move around, especially in a split-level home. Aurora and I camped out so that I wouldn't have to use any stairs. Once Jon was back to work, the mental stress began.


At first I thought I was just experiencing postpartum depression, which I had feared for years upon years after hearing scary stories. I so badly wished that I had more support during that time. Many memories are still blurry, but I do know I had what I now know to be called intrusive thoughts. A lot of them.


The big realization that I wanted to seek help came during an otherwise seemingly simple incident. Sometime after the lockdown ended, we were invited to dinner with my husband's aunt and uncle and we very cautiously accepted. Typically I'm the one to very eagerly raise my hand to choose the restaurant, and Jon knowing that asked me which one. I had a wild breakdown and just could not do it. Even thinking back on it as I'm writing this, it sounds almost silly and I'm sure Jon was entirely confused when it happened. But I know it to be true and I'm grateful that I was given an outrageous sign so that I noticed it.


I want to keep these first posts short and sweet, doing some healthy stretches before going all in with a full sprint, so I'll leave it at that for now.


Topics for Another Day

-the issue I had with phrasing for diagnosis

-my personal hang-up turned acceptance of the meds

-social media as a tool

-my love of exploring new places


All the love,

Kaitlynn


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By the way:

I'm not a medical professional.

None of this is medical advice.

My blog is only for educational/entertainment purposes based on my personal life experiences.

Reading my blog nor working with me are replacements for professional medical help.





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